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Community Corner

A Potty Mouth is a Good Thing When it Comes to Training

Talking is a big part of the potty training process.

Q: My son is starting pre-school in the fall and he has to be potty trained. We’re making some progress, but not as much as I’d like. Do you have any tips?

A: There are a few different tactics for potty training. How you choose to go about it depends on your style and your child’s personality.

Start out by talking about it. A lot.

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Let your child come in with you to see what it’s all about. Fun, I know.

There are plenty of books and videos on the subject available. Pick up a couple and subtly mix them in with your bedtime stories.

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We have “Even Firefighters Go To The Potty” by Wendy Wax and Naomi Wax. The illustrations, by Stephen Gilpin, are quite amusing. On each page someone from a different profession (fireman, policeman, doctor, etc) is missing and he or she can be found behind the flap (a bathroom door) taking care of business.

Next, get the requisite gear.

You’ll need a potty or at least the adapter seat for your regular sized toilet.

At the recommendation of a couple different friends, I also got a portable, fold-up toilet to keep in the car. It’s the Potette and can be used as a stand-alone potty or as a training seat. It comes with plastic bags with a liner (to catch the deposit) that you simply throw away, so it’s easy to use and clean up. Regular shopping bags with a folded up paper towel work as well.

Get plenty of underwear (I like the padded ones for that extra little bit of absorption). It just feels different than diapers or pull-ups and your child will know immediately when he’s wet.

Buying some with a favorite character or letting your child help pick out her new undies is another way to build excitement about this new adventure.

Stock up on paper towels and disinfectant spray. Remember that accidents are inevitable and freaking out about them will not help the process.

Next, look for the signs that your child is ready. From everything that I’ve read, if you try to force it before your child is ready, you’re starting a fight you won’t win, at least not quickly.

If you child is not ready or cries or has temper tantrums about potty training, stop and wait and try again in a few weeks.

Basic signs that he’s ready:

Your child has to be able to communicate well enough to tell you when he has to go.

He shows some interest in using the toilet.

He lets you know promptly when he has a dirty diaper and wants to change it.

His diaper is dry for periods of two hours or more at a time and/or he wakes up from his nap with a dry diaper.

His bowel movements are somewhat regular.

He can pull his pants up and down by himself or with a little help.

He can follow basic directions.

Now you’re ready to start. Be prepared to have potty training rule your life for a while.

Establish a schedule and stick to it, especially at first. Have him go when he wakes up in the morning and then take him back to the bathroom every hour or two to “try.”

If you cannot stay home, close to the potty for days on end, you can start by doing it for 2-3 hour stints while you are at home and switch back to the diaper when you need to go out.

When he shows signs that he has to go, get him to the potty FAST. This will help him make the connection between what he’s feeling in his body and going to the bathroom.

Dress for success. Now is not the time for complicated snaps and zippers or overalls or even bodysuit shirts. Elastic waists rule!

A friend recommended getting Croc-style shoes because you can easily hose them off if needed.

Keep it relaxed. Sit with your child in the bathroom, maybe ready a story or sing songs while he sits on the potty.

Cheer him on! Praise, praise and praise some more when he actually goes in the potty. Call grandma, grandpa, auntie and the neighbor to announce the achievement.

Remember to make hand washing an automatic part of the process.

Set up a reward or incentive system. Charts with stickers are very commonly used. Usually after your child has earned a set amount of stickers, he gets a small prize.

A friend gave her son one M&M every time he peed and four if he pooped. For us, the promise of a lollypop if he poops in the toilet has definitely caught my son’s attention.

If your child shows fear or stress, discuss it with him. Maybe even playact that you’re the one who is afraid of the toilet to get him to laugh about it.

I had a friend whose son was a neat freak. She just put him in regular underwear and if he had an accident, she gave him the paper towels and he had to clean it up. He didn’t like that too well and was trained in a couple of days.

There is also the let the child run around naked from the waist down for a weekend method. I’ve heard from a couple different moms that it worked for them.

For boys especially, peeing on a tree in the backyard or “watering” the grass could be a fun incentive.

If you are worried about exactly how potty trained he has to be before starting school, check with the school’s director to see what their practices are.

Preschool staff members expect accidents, especially for three-year-olds who are just starting on a big new adventure.

They should be allies in the process as well, since your child’s success makes their jobs easier.

I hope it goes well (pun intended)!

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